Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Trent Update: So we're pretty sure a mountain moved

So I say "pretty sure" only because something rather crappy happened a little over 2 weeks ago. We were contacted by our agency that the letter had been obtained by the social worker in BG, but that it was not yet in the hands of the Miskaye/Holt Ethiopia staff and that they would confirm when it was turned in to the courts. We were very very happy about this, but we chose to not tell the world until that letter was safely submitted to Federal Mowyca.


Because I got "that call" (and my agency never calls unless it is bad, I have learned this now 3 times)on Monday 3 days after, saying that no... there had been a miscommunication somewhere along the chain of 4 different entities translating information, and that our Regional letter had in fact NOT been released, as Regional BG office would not release it without a written notice from Federal MOYWCA... and guess what.. in general federal MOWYCA will not write such things.

STUCK AGAIN AT SQUARE ONE after a few days thinking we would be on a plane near the end of February. There was a big ugly cry.. and since I had not had a big ugly cry in over a year since seeing this child's face and writing a letter of intent, I would give myself that.

The next day, big girl panties came back on.

The next day we launched our great sourcing of medical evaluation letters from wherever we could get to send to Ethiopia to use as leverage to sway either the Regional Office to clear him on grounds of this new information necessitating international adoption OR using it towards Federal MOWYCA to give us a pardon for this updating of letter business. That is pretty much what we have been doing since then. Lots of emailing different doctors and thanking them for helping us. We have obtained 8 letters as of now from different specialists, including an Ethiopian (now living in the US) physician that works at Ted's hospital who was trained in Addis and can verify the abilities of the hospitals there regarding the ongoing care my child will need to succeed. He made some pretty serious points as someone who would know better than anyone what the Ethiopian medical system is and is not able to handle long term.

So there we were. We also got another unpleasant call from our agency yesterday letting us know of some developments reported from another family from Trent's orphanage whose daughter has been home for some time now and whose English is now good enough to describe her time there. There were some bad things being reported, and that is all I can say, because I was only given this information because my child is the only child from my agency who is still living under that roof in those conditions. There will be an investigation of sorts, but as my kid is stuck there and legally "married" somewhat to that center regarding his paperwork, there is nothing that I can do. Yesterday was a hard day. Not only were we stuck with no idea how long (or forever?) he would be stuck, but now there are allegations that he could be harmed or not kept safe WHILE being stuck. These are just allegations, but still. God and I had some silent words on this topic yesterday. It was not my finest hour, but I kept my composure and sent that energy where it needed to be sent.


So today I was better, having re-released my little man back to the hands of our sovereign God and re-released myself to the trenches of "cold turkey" potty training my 3 year old. I was engaged in a serious hour long "poop stand off" with said 3 year old when an email from my agency dinged into my phone.. and this was surprising because I didn't know of any specific thing I was supposed to be hearing back from them about after I just talked to them yesterday.

So, I will now tell you that our Regional letter was obtained!!!!

The only reason I say that with any kind of confidence, is because it was already submitted to Ethiopian court, who in turn gave federal MOWYCA a new deadline to produce positive comments (our clearance letter) of March 3rd. We have a really good chance of having our MOWYCA clearance at that time. A definite chance?? Heaven's no. This is Ethiopia. I have zero trust... but I DO know that they have already grilled my child's file (hence, making us update that regional letter technicality) and have already grilled us the Sibley's (made me submitted a new Power of Attorney fully authenticated that took a month back in November) and I already gave my agency an updated homestudy for this year so they can't get me on that. Is there a chance they will find another new and ridiculous thing?? YES.. but none of us can think what that would be at this point since we have already been audited.

Now, when we have MOWYCA clearance, that is when the Sibley's will be getting jiggy with it and really preparing to fly and bring this boy home. That clearance is the child welfare of Ethiopia officially releasing him to be a Sibley. The US Embassy has already cleared him so they are ready for him to be a Sibley too. The last piece will be inviting us to court as the last piece of the puzzle. IF (big big IF) we get a positive clearance on 3/3, we are betting we will get to fly sometime in March depending on when they schedule our court date.

Then a beautiful Ethiopian adoption decree will get all laminated naming this kid Eskedar Ted Sibley and it will be awesome.


Please keep our paperwork in your prayers. It ain't done until you are on that plane home with that piece of precious child clawing off your face and screaming (woohoo!!! It's a PARTY. A 16 hour long party over the Atlantic that you asked for btw).

******* But a moment to be serious********

Along with this exciting news on our court issues, we also got some not so nice news on our little guy. He is having some adverse reactions to the new seizure medication he was put on. He isn't eating (already failure to thrive!!)and is lethargic and bleeding out of his nose. He is was taken off of Tegretol and put on a different seizure medication. They will be monitoring his blood levels (we hope) and we really hope that he begins to feel better soon.

So not just that vague "bad stuff" I mentioned above about allegations against his care center, I have a little boy who really needs to get home to his proper pediatric neurologist so we can get his meds on track and his seizures under control.

******But what about those two little kids you are helping??******

They are still here and still precious. Their mom has made great strides and the plan is for the kids to return home next month. We really hope to be sending these kids back to a new apartment with their mother, but there is a chance that we won't be able to time things that perfectly. I don't like that, but at the same time, when we said yes to these kids it was an emergency yes where everyone knew our adoption could move at any time and that will be that. In a perfect world of orphan care/prevention, these kiddos will be in a stable space just before I need to hop on a plane. Pray for that ya'll. I love these little goobers and I want them to thrive.

So I really hope to have some MOWYCA clearance news in the next few weeks!! That will be a party. A party involving me never having to play with them ever again, as my last round with Ben was no party either. In the meantime, Trent will get here when he gets here and we will not lose our junk. We will play in the snow while Mom hides in the kitchen, admiring the cuteness of these other 3 goons who got here eventually too.