It's been a little quiet lately in the area of referrals. I remember back in Jan and Feb while I was doing paperwork it was the same way... before the 60 referrals that happened in March!
We're hoping that the quietness is for the same reason.. that there is a big batch on its way to clear out a chunk of the "list".
#5 is a fantastic place to be. I was really happy for the update. Truthfully, I don't think we will make it to a "lower" number at this point. Both of the gals that were before me and after me have received their referrals.. and I believe everyone in front of me at this point is requesting an infant girl. So IF a perfect baby boy should be ready for referral.. it would likely come to us!
June was a tough month because I really did expect to have news by now. I also spent the entire month of June in the bottom 10 of the list and expecting more news. Now that June has come and gone.. we're kind of in a space of peaceful whateverness. The courts will be closing soon in August.. so it is unlikely that even if we get a referral on Monday that we will make the cut off before they close for the rainy season. In this way.. I would rather "wait" with no baby news during this closure than be staring at a little face every day knowing that our case won't go anywhere for awhile.
I have girlfriends in that exact position. They have their referrals.. they know who will be joining their families and there is a lot of joy and excitement.. they just don't have court dates yet so they don't have a good idea of when their families will all be together on the same continent. That's rough.
I'm pre-praying for that period of the wait. I think that that will be the hardest for me because I only had a 6 day span of knowing about Lucas before he was in my arms. This time around? Could be more like 6 months. The difference? That I know that I know that I know that this will all work together for His purpose and that God is preparing our family.
We got our first "reject" letter from one of our grant applications. While that was a bummer, it is always nice to have an answer. That is more prayer energy for the other 4 :-)
We are also designing some t-shirts that we will be selling to family and our church in hopes of raising at least $1,000 of the 8,000 that we need for travel. We are hoping that God can prepare the hearts of the folks of Deerbrook Covenant Church that they would want to be involved in bringing our child home.
I have fantastic days, "blah" days, and difficult days during this wait. Fantastic days happen when I am just loving my son, enjoying my prayer time, and keeping busy in this beautiful summer I have been given. "Blah" days happen when I'm tired from doing all the things listed above and I miss my husband.. and the difficult days happen when I just wish I had news and I long to see the face of the little person I have been praying about since last summer. Sometimes I play a little game with myself called "You're not waiting for the call. I dare you to leave your phone out of sight and earshot!" So far I have been able to do this a couple times for up to 2 hours. After a month of being jumpy every time the phone rang.. now I'm challenging myself to act like I don't care :-)
In my prayer time, I have asked God to enable me to go be doing something good and productive with my life when that phone rings.
I have also been using this time to dig up some old feelings.. the feelings that were hard to face when I was waiting for Lucas- ie: parenting adopted children that will have to deal with grief and loss in various stages of their little lives. I have had 3 years now of healing and processing from my own loss of biological children and I still have far to go.. but we're getting there. We want to be in a place of emotional health to meet the needs of our children.. not in a place of needing our children to avoid our own grief. That's a lot to chew but there is a lot of positive and engaging literature out there for folks such as myself, written from the viewpoint of adopted children, to help us parents "get it" when our children speak.
I'll share with you all at a later point what I have been up to.. but it's deep lol
That pretty much summarizes this blog update.. that is here more for my children to read someday in the far off future. This blog serves as a way to update family about our lives which is all fine and good.. but like any good journal you have to remember write down your feelings when you're having them :-)
Friday, July 2, 2010
Monday, June 21, 2010
Lucky #7
So it has been a few weeks with minimal movement on the list. On one hand, we have waited a little longer than we originally anticipated given the amount of referrals in the spring, but on the other hand, we are still on the shorter end of the wait timeline that our agency is quoting. Nothing to complain about, but still looking forward to some news soon :-)
MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs) was closed last week due to a holiday. None of the people that received referrals in May or June have been assigned court dates. We are hoping these folks get court dates soon so that they can get the first Ethiopia trip out of the way before the courts close for the raining season (about 6 weeks from mid of Aug through October).
So there wasn't any news today, but we can't really expect lots of referrals and court dates to come from the Ethiopia staff who have to obtain them from MOWA in their first day of being open after the closure.
Since I'm starting to get a bit more anxious.. I'm trying to not be. I went to pick up some more adoption reading and I'm trying to focus on good quiet time with God, play dates, and time with family and friends.
Lucas and I have had some wonderful days at the zoo.. so that will be our cuteness factor of this blog update :-)
Here are some pictures of his favorite animals and activities while at the zoo!
Of course we had to remember to chat about our new brother or sister while we were on the Africa side of the zoo!!
It was so hot on this day that my camera lense was all fogged up, but it managed to capture the joy of a little boy waiting for the choo choo train to start :-)
Thank you Grandma and Grandpa Sibley for the zoo pass!
MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs) was closed last week due to a holiday. None of the people that received referrals in May or June have been assigned court dates. We are hoping these folks get court dates soon so that they can get the first Ethiopia trip out of the way before the courts close for the raining season (about 6 weeks from mid of Aug through October).
So there wasn't any news today, but we can't really expect lots of referrals and court dates to come from the Ethiopia staff who have to obtain them from MOWA in their first day of being open after the closure.
Since I'm starting to get a bit more anxious.. I'm trying to not be. I went to pick up some more adoption reading and I'm trying to focus on good quiet time with God, play dates, and time with family and friends.
Lucas and I have had some wonderful days at the zoo.. so that will be our cuteness factor of this blog update :-)
Here are some pictures of his favorite animals and activities while at the zoo!
Of course we had to remember to chat about our new brother or sister while we were on the Africa side of the zoo!!
It was so hot on this day that my camera lense was all fogged up, but it managed to capture the joy of a little boy waiting for the choo choo train to start :-)
Thank you Grandma and Grandpa Sibley for the zoo pass!
BabyMoon #2
We had a FANTASTIC time on a much needed marital weekend. We began to plan this weekend back when our paperwork first went and Ted was on pulmonary rotation in April... because that month was about equally exciting (babies) as it was difficult (rotation). SO.. Ted started trying to find a way to get 2 days off in a row which is no small deal and I started to coordinate child-care and book a hotel room in downtown KC.
We hadn't spent time like this together since Colombia in 2008. As overjoyed as we were..I don't think we really understood that we would never be alone in a hotel room again. We were such rookies.
So we planned to spend an entire 24 hour period doing things we couldn't do with our beloved little boy.. or the baby that is on the way. Seize the moment right??!!! So this was how we celebrated Father's Day, our 7th Anniversary (June 7th), and our coming baby....
This is me hanging out in the car because we kept forgetting stuff..
Nothing says excitement like IHOP. Ted loves IHOP. Happy Father's Day to Teddy.
We went from there to the Nelson-Atkins art museum in KC. We walked through the whole thing.. and I rather enjoyed the silence :-) We couldn't take photos in there.. but we can basically sum it up by saying everything was beautiful and old and priceless of course.
When we came back out to the entrance the weather had changed dramatically from when we had enterred and we were in the middle of a nasty storm that we had to wait out before driving.
We left the museum and drove about 45 min out of the city to a rustic area of Kansas and enjoyed an adorable winery. It was quaint and the staff was fantastic! We bought a few gifts and look forward to visiting again!
After some wonderful wine sampling we drove back into downtown KC to check in to the Philips Hotel downtown. It's a cute old 4 star establishment just a couple blocks from Power and Light. The room was tiny but very charming. We even brought our own picnic basket of yummies.
This is the view from our room on the 15th floor
These are the fountains near our hotel in front of the convention center
The following photos are of a couple having entirely too much fun in each others presence after being married for 7 years and together almost 10. We went to Howl at the Moon to see some very fun musicians.
So we enjoyed some alone time walking around the Crown Center and Union Station area on Father's Day. Union station was having a fun family sidewalk art festival going on which we returned to later with Lucas ;-)
This is Washington Park outside of Crown Center
Outside the WW1 Museum
Since it was really really hot that day we brought Lucas back to play with the kids :-)
We hadn't spent time like this together since Colombia in 2008. As overjoyed as we were..I don't think we really understood that we would never be alone in a hotel room again. We were such rookies.
So we planned to spend an entire 24 hour period doing things we couldn't do with our beloved little boy.. or the baby that is on the way. Seize the moment right??!!! So this was how we celebrated Father's Day, our 7th Anniversary (June 7th), and our coming baby....
This is me hanging out in the car because we kept forgetting stuff..
Nothing says excitement like IHOP. Ted loves IHOP. Happy Father's Day to Teddy.
We went from there to the Nelson-Atkins art museum in KC. We walked through the whole thing.. and I rather enjoyed the silence :-) We couldn't take photos in there.. but we can basically sum it up by saying everything was beautiful and old and priceless of course.
When we came back out to the entrance the weather had changed dramatically from when we had enterred and we were in the middle of a nasty storm that we had to wait out before driving.
We left the museum and drove about 45 min out of the city to a rustic area of Kansas and enjoyed an adorable winery. It was quaint and the staff was fantastic! We bought a few gifts and look forward to visiting again!
After some wonderful wine sampling we drove back into downtown KC to check in to the Philips Hotel downtown. It's a cute old 4 star establishment just a couple blocks from Power and Light. The room was tiny but very charming. We even brought our own picnic basket of yummies.
This is the view from our room on the 15th floor
These are the fountains near our hotel in front of the convention center
The following photos are of a couple having entirely too much fun in each others presence after being married for 7 years and together almost 10. We went to Howl at the Moon to see some very fun musicians.
So we enjoyed some alone time walking around the Crown Center and Union Station area on Father's Day. Union station was having a fun family sidewalk art festival going on which we returned to later with Lucas ;-)
This is Washington Park outside of Crown Center
Outside the WW1 Museum
Since it was really really hot that day we brought Lucas back to play with the kids :-)
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Still hanging at #8
I checked in yesterday after letting Holt know about our immigration and they confirmed we're still at #8.
Which is always a happy place to be!
Which is always a happy place to be!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Happy I-171H day!
We received our immigration clearance last night after 2 months of waiting for it to clear.
What does that mean? It means that after our referral, and after we have passed court in Ethiopia, that when we are ready to go to the US Embassy to have our child's immigration settled, that they will say "Ah yes... Erin Sibley... I have you in the system approved for (insert child's name here)" and they just do it :-)
So the fingerprinting and background checking have already been completed so our child will enter the United States fully known to Homeland Security.
Since I have the time due to Lucas taking a power nap.. I think today is a great day to explain some random points of this adoption process- both for some of our new friends, and also for old friends and family that watched us go through this 2-3 years ago.
REFERRAL PROCESS
For Colombia friends: We still go off of I600, but now you can't apply until after Homestudy is complete.. but you have to have a full clearance before you can be submitted to court- hence why getting it in 2 months was good for us. Referrals are more steady- as our office does closer to 150 referrals across the nation per year from Ethiopia. Referral information is similar in terms of what you get at the time of referral.
Once you accept referral, they take those signed referral papers and submit them to the Ethiopia government.. where you are eventually assigned a court date (Sentencia) 1-2 months later
TRIP 1- COURT
For you Colombia families.. Trip one is basically showing up for Sentencia. We aren't being grilled or anything by the judge, we are just there to say "Yes, we are us, and that is our baby, and we want it!" Think of it like a Bienstar interview. Once you testify for the judge, your time is complete. Our case may not necessarily clear that day- as sometimes another random paper peace is missing calling to revisit the case in a week or so. It's totally normal and nothing to freak out about. The first court trip is a new requirement (that has changed since we started this process). It is to ensure that no agencies are able to lie about the condition and age of our child prior to the baby becoming ours. This is a great way to ensure the children are being processed correctly, it just costs us some more money. But we get more time seeing our baby earlier in the process and more pictures!
TRIP 2- Once your case passes court (sentencia) the baby is yours. At that time, all of those documents get submitted to the US Embassy.. but the Embassy in Ethiopia is a lot busier with babies so you have to wait for a visa appointment. This is usually about 6-8 weeks after they get all your papers from the court. Then they call and say "Hey Erin, be here about a month from now for the Embassy". At that time, I come back and do the running around that we do in Colombia post sentencia.
ALL THAT BEING SAID...
So we are waiting patiently for our referral :-) At that time, we will let you know gender and age and health. We are unable to post any photos of our child on our blog, facebook, or any other public place until after we come home. This is the Ethiopian governments way of protecting their children from exploitation.
Unlike with Lucas, you will just have to be in suspense until baby comes home ;-)
We are enjoying this blessing of a time of waiting. Would I love a referral today? Yes. But this needs to be God's timing in His way. He has our baby in his hands at this moment.. and we can't wait for some news!
What does that mean? It means that after our referral, and after we have passed court in Ethiopia, that when we are ready to go to the US Embassy to have our child's immigration settled, that they will say "Ah yes... Erin Sibley... I have you in the system approved for (insert child's name here)" and they just do it :-)
So the fingerprinting and background checking have already been completed so our child will enter the United States fully known to Homeland Security.
Since I have the time due to Lucas taking a power nap.. I think today is a great day to explain some random points of this adoption process- both for some of our new friends, and also for old friends and family that watched us go through this 2-3 years ago.
REFERRAL PROCESS
For Colombia friends: We still go off of I600, but now you can't apply until after Homestudy is complete.. but you have to have a full clearance before you can be submitted to court- hence why getting it in 2 months was good for us. Referrals are more steady- as our office does closer to 150 referrals across the nation per year from Ethiopia. Referral information is similar in terms of what you get at the time of referral.
Once you accept referral, they take those signed referral papers and submit them to the Ethiopia government.. where you are eventually assigned a court date (Sentencia) 1-2 months later
TRIP 1- COURT
For you Colombia families.. Trip one is basically showing up for Sentencia. We aren't being grilled or anything by the judge, we are just there to say "Yes, we are us, and that is our baby, and we want it!" Think of it like a Bienstar interview. Once you testify for the judge, your time is complete. Our case may not necessarily clear that day- as sometimes another random paper peace is missing calling to revisit the case in a week or so. It's totally normal and nothing to freak out about. The first court trip is a new requirement (that has changed since we started this process). It is to ensure that no agencies are able to lie about the condition and age of our child prior to the baby becoming ours. This is a great way to ensure the children are being processed correctly, it just costs us some more money. But we get more time seeing our baby earlier in the process and more pictures!
TRIP 2- Once your case passes court (sentencia) the baby is yours. At that time, all of those documents get submitted to the US Embassy.. but the Embassy in Ethiopia is a lot busier with babies so you have to wait for a visa appointment. This is usually about 6-8 weeks after they get all your papers from the court. Then they call and say "Hey Erin, be here about a month from now for the Embassy". At that time, I come back and do the running around that we do in Colombia post sentencia.
ALL THAT BEING SAID...
So we are waiting patiently for our referral :-) At that time, we will let you know gender and age and health. We are unable to post any photos of our child on our blog, facebook, or any other public place until after we come home. This is the Ethiopian governments way of protecting their children from exploitation.
Unlike with Lucas, you will just have to be in suspense until baby comes home ;-)
We are enjoying this blessing of a time of waiting. Would I love a referral today? Yes. But this needs to be God's timing in His way. He has our baby in his hands at this moment.. and we can't wait for some news!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Memorial Day in Iowa
We were able to have the Black family reunion in Iowa to welcome my grandparents back from Florida and also to celebrate Grandma's 75th Bday and Grandpa's 80th!
We enjoyed a great day at my aunt Peggy's house while the kids played outside and we enjoyed some fantastic food. Ted even had the day off making it perfect. Here are a few photos from the day.
Look at this little boy sitting with the big kids! He didn't even throw anything or put pre-chewed food on anybody else's plate. I was so proud :-)
We enjoyed a great day at my aunt Peggy's house while the kids played outside and we enjoyed some fantastic food. Ted even had the day off making it perfect. Here are a few photos from the day.
Look at this little boy sitting with the big kids! He didn't even throw anything or put pre-chewed food on anybody else's plate. I was so proud :-)
Being number 8-9... or somewhere around there!
So there was more movement on the list in the last week of May.. and according to my sources the gal in front of me was told she was #7 last Thursday!
Deep breaths.
We were scheduled for our I600a immigration fingerprinting on Friday May 28th. We were very thankful to finally receive notice of this appointment- because some of the new regulations to be admitted to court require your immigration approval. In the worst case scenario we could receive a referral.. only to wait for months while our case goes nowhere because we're waiting for a silly piece of paper. Having the appointment done means that they have our stuff and it is being processed, and hopefully that clearance will come soon before the referral or shortly after to not hold us up from being admitted to court quickly. People that applied after April 6th (us) have been receiving approvals within a few weeks of their printing, so let's hope we are the same!
After our printing was done I had an "excuse" to email Holt to let them know and request our number- they verified that we are somewhere in the 8-9 ballpark due to some referrals that were still in process.
So at this time.. if I were a guessing person.. I would think that we will have a referral sometime this month. It's possible that it could not be until next month, but then we would be at the top of the list by then I would think.
Exciting to think of what this month might bring in adoption news!
Deep breaths.
We were scheduled for our I600a immigration fingerprinting on Friday May 28th. We were very thankful to finally receive notice of this appointment- because some of the new regulations to be admitted to court require your immigration approval. In the worst case scenario we could receive a referral.. only to wait for months while our case goes nowhere because we're waiting for a silly piece of paper. Having the appointment done means that they have our stuff and it is being processed, and hopefully that clearance will come soon before the referral or shortly after to not hold us up from being admitted to court quickly. People that applied after April 6th (us) have been receiving approvals within a few weeks of their printing, so let's hope we are the same!
After our printing was done I had an "excuse" to email Holt to let them know and request our number- they verified that we are somewhere in the 8-9 ballpark due to some referrals that were still in process.
So at this time.. if I were a guessing person.. I would think that we will have a referral sometime this month. It's possible that it could not be until next month, but then we would be at the top of the list by then I would think.
Exciting to think of what this month might bring in adoption news!
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